WASHINGTON, April 12 (Yonhap) -- In a shocking turn of events, President Donald Trump has revealed that the United States is engaged in what he calls 'deep negotiations' with Iran, but not over nuclear weapons or oil. Instead, the discussions are centered around who can assemble the ultimate K-Pop group.

'We win no matter what happens,' Trump confidently announced while wearing a brightly colored K-Pop hoodie, a gift he claimed was from a top Iranian general who is also a secret fan of BTS. 'If they can breakdance better than us, we’ll simply challenge them to a dance-off on national television.'

Sources close to the negotiations say that both sides are currently auditioning singers and dancers, with Iran reportedly considering a collaboration with a talented group of cats trained in the art of K-Pop.

"If anyone can turn a diplomatic crisis into a chart-topping album, it’s us!" - An anonymous White House aide

According to a recent poll conducted by the International Association of K-Pop Fans, 87% of respondents believe that if the U.S. and Iran cannot come to an agreement on the ultimate K-Pop group, tensions in the Middle East will escalate to an all-out musical war.

  • Potential band names being discussed include:
    • ‘The Nuclear Beats’
    • ‘Tehran Dancers’
    • ‘The Sanctioned Stars’
  • A predicted ‘K-Pop Summit’ is set to take place on a floating stage in the middle of the Persian Gulf.
  • Each nation has agreed to provide its best bubble tea as a peace offering.

Experts in international relations are baffled by this new approach. Dr. Kim Ryu, a professor of absurd diplomacy at Seoul National University, stated, 'This is the first time in history that a nation has used pop music as a bargaining chip. If they can throw in a national K-Pop festival, we might see true peace.'

Critics, however, are concerned that this strategy could backfire. 'Imagine if Iran wins the K-Pop competition,' said a concerned Senate member. 'They might gain so much popularity that they’d take over the charts, and we can’t have that!' Meanwhile, Trump defended his approach, claiming, 'Even if we lose, we’ll have the best dance moves. It’s all about the optics!'

As negotiations continue, the world waits with bated breath for the first-ever ‘K-Pop Peace Concert,’ where diplomatic leaders will attempt to resolve their differences with synchronized dance routines and catchy hooks. 'This will go down in history as the moment the world realized that music truly is the universal language,' Trump declared, as he practiced his ‘Gangnam Style’ moves backstage.

In conclusion, as the U.S. and Iran engage in these bizarre negotiations, one thing is certain: the future of diplomacy may very well depend on who can perform the best ‘Maknae’ dance move!